So begins another job hunting experience. I haven’t been at this job an entire two years and I found out that I have until June or July…if that. I can look at it as a blessing in disguise since I do not particularly care my job or the company. But damn, every two years? Really, do I have to look for a job every two years because the companies I work for close down or merge or just reduce staff? So, I guess this is my push to really look for that job I want and love and I have time to be fastidious, however limited it may be. I have to wonder, though, what kind of stress will this put on my kid.
All of this comes at a price. Since there are no jobs of quality or the pay level I seek in my immediate vicinity, I am looking to relocate to Atlanta or even Savannah. The jobs seem to be plentiful and so does the pay. I will definitely need that increase because I will be placing my kid in full-time daycare or preschool. This takes some serious dough, folks. In even thinking about a major move, I am totally stressed. I have to look for a house and verify sure the neighborhood is safe and has excellent schools. I need a wonderful backyard like I have now so my kid can dig in the dirt and make me soil and rock soup and run with the dogs and big enough to fit a swing set. Finding a house that’s dog friendly is also a challenge. Don’t get me wrong, I love me a challenge…but not when I have to face it with my kid in tow. If it was just me, I would not be writing about this. It would be cake!
My world will be going topsy-turvy very soon and my kid will soon feel those effects. I hate putting this type of burden on him. He will be leaving everything he knows and everyone he knows and his life will be changing drastically. As much as I try to shield him from my stress and not project that onto him or our lifestyle, kids can be perceptive as to a parent’s mood change. I could not even eat last night, I just sat next to him and talked about his day and his chicken nuggets. I can only hope that I do find a great job with lots and lots of job security so we will not have to go through this again any time soon. I hate this stupid recession. It seems so unnecessary and a resolution does not seem to be in sight. The upcoming elections are only going to make things worse… I think.
So now what? Do I proceed with acting like everything is okay or do I start talking to my three year old about what is going to happen? “They” keep telling me that kids are resilient…but how much stress can a toddler go through before it becomes a burden that causes lasting problems? I feel like I am failing my kid. I want to give him security and I cannot seem to keep a job. I just want to scream and cry. Seriously. But I don’t have time and hell if I’m going to do it in front of my kid.
I wish things were different. I feel like a jinx to these companies. But I know, in the end…everything will be just fine and…This Too Shall Pass!